AgeSexLocation?
by Once-Upon-A-Fairy's-Tale
Summary: Loki secretly likes to roleplay Frostiron on Omegle. Tony is bored and decides to chat up strangers on Omegle. The two of them unintentionally cross paths and discover their true identities much too late into the conversation. (Mostly crack.) Rated M for language and mild smut.


I know I should be updating TDATD, but... well... I will soon. Sorry! Anyway, here's this. (This was inspired by the FrostIron RPers I've just recently discovered on Omegle.)

* * *

Tony was bored. Terribly bored. What did Tony Stark usually do when he was bored? He built things, he drank, and he had sex. Currently, he could do neither. Why? Because the Avengers. He had blown up half his lab and almost gotten himself killed in a drunken attempt to finish an experiment. They had grounded him. No drinking, no lab, no leaving the tower (that meant no sex). They had even convinced Jarvis, his _own_ AI, to not allow him access to the lab. And, so, Tony found himself browsing the internet until he settled with annoying people on Omegle.

Tony was the one getting pissed off, though. People kept disconnecting him. He pretended to be a horny guy and people disconnected him. He had even pretended to be a horny teenage girl and they still had disconnected him. He pretended to be a nice guy and people disconnected him. Eventually he decided to tell people he was himself, and, even then, the bastards disconnected him.

"Fuck you too," Tony muttered to the screen. He talked to a few people in the Avengers tag, but they all wanted to RP Steve and himself (as if that would ever happen) or Natasha and Clint (that was already happening) or himself and Bruce (eww, not my science bro!), or Thor and everyone (just no). Then he discovered those role playing as Loki, and with that he also discovered the strange new world known as FrostIron.

Tony lurked around the FrostIron tag, reading RP prompts and laughing incredulously to himself. "This should be interesting," he said aloud as he answered someone looking to RP.

**Stranger:** I'm Loki looking for Tony to have fun with. I promise I'll be gentle.

**You:** That son of a bitch is never gentle. Trust me, I'd know.

**Stranger:** I find it very difficult to believe that you would know me.

**You:** Whatever. I want to be Loki.

**Stranger:** No.

**You:** Don't you want to be Tony? He's fucking awesome.

**Stranger:** No.

**You:** I'll let you fuck me and do whatever you want to me as Tony. ;)

**Stranger:** …

**Stranger:** It's worth a shot.

**You:** Fabulous.

**Stranger:** Tony shoved Loki against the wall. He ran a hand through the god's hair before tightening his grip and pulling his head down for a violent kiss.

**You: **Loki moaned and snaked his hands under Tony's shirt trying to touch as much skin as possible.

**Stranger:** Tony pushed his knee in between Loki's legs and started rubbing his crotch.

**You:** "Just fuck me already," Loki hissed. He bit Tony's shoulder as he ground his hips.

**Stranger:** "No," Tony grinned. "I'll make you wait as long as I want."

("What the fuck," real Tony exclaimed. "I wouldn't ever wait for sex. I want, they give.") **  
You:** "I don't wait for anyone," Loki groaned. "I am a god, you stupid mortal. Give me what I want."

**Stranger:** "No," Tony yanked Loki's hair to push his head back and expose more of his neck, "I am the god here. You should worship me." He sucked on a spot on Loki's neck until it bruised, and then made three more.

(_That's more like it_, Tony thought.)

**You:** Loki whimpered, but obliged and let Tony mark him.

**Stranger:** LOKI DOES NOT WHIMPER!

**Stranger:** I mean

**Stranger:** Tony replaced the knee on Loki's crotch with his hand and gripped a little too hard.

**You:** "Tony," Loki moaned. He thrust into Tony's hand trying to get some friction, but stopped when Tony's grip tightened uncomfortably.

**Stranger:** "Only I can pleasure you," Tony snarled. "Stop moving yourself."

**You:** Loki kissed Tony as an apology but didn't lower the hands exploring Tony's body.

**Stranger:** "Good." Tony flung his shirt off giving Loki better access to the top half of his body. "Strip for me."

**You: **Loki slowly ran his hands down his shirt but tore it off quickly when he got to the hem. He reached his belt and played with the buckle before opening it, taking his time to slide it off, and doing his best to tease Tony.

**Stranger: **Tony pushed Loki's hand away and ripped the belt away in one swift movement. "Don't keep me waiting," he warned.

**You:** Loki hastily pulled his slacks off and threw them across the room. "Is this better," he bit his tongue, "Tony?"

**Stranger: **"Yes," Tony smirked, absorbing every bit of Loki's gorgeous naked body with his eyes. "If there's one good thing about Aesir gods, it's that you never wear any underwear."

("Really?" Real Tony thought aloud. "That explains why Thor always thought it was okay to swim in the pool with them butt ass naked.")

**You:** "I appreciate you ogling me," Loki smiled innocently, "but can we please get to the fucking part?"

**Stranger:** Tony rolled his eyes. "Don't rush me."

**You:** "Take your fucking jeans off at least," Loki hissed.

**Stranger:** Tony licked a stripe from Loki's collarbone to his ear. "Why don't you take them off for me?" He whispered into Loki's ear.

**You:** Loki wasted no time in yanking his pants and boxers down and off. He took in the sight of Tony in all his glory and felt himself growing harder.

**Stranger:** Tony began to stroke Loki lazily.

**You:** Loki began to moan impatiently. "Tony, please."

**Stranger:** LOKI DOESN'T BEG EITHER!

**You:** I don't give a fuck!

**Stranger:** You will when I find you and rip your stupid mortal head off your neck.

**You:** This is ridiculous. I can't believe I thought this was a good idea. I'm done.

**Stranger:** Wait until I find you. What is your name?

**You:** That's the funny thing. My name really is Tony Stark. I am Tony Stark.

**Stranger:** Do not lie to me. Tell me your name.

**You:** Wanna find me? Come to Stark Tower. I'm right here.

**Stranger:** I will rip you to shreds when I find you!

**You:** Why don't you tell me your name? How about I find you and I rip you a new one?

**Stranger: **Only because you have asked so nicely, I will admit. I truly am Loki, and I truly will kill you.

**You:** No you're not. Come on. What's your real name?

**Stranger: **Loki.

**You:** Right.

**Stranger:** Do you doubt me, you sentient scut?

**You:** A what?

**You:** Whatever. Prove it.

**You:** Prove you're Loki.

**Stranger:** Thor's hair was green for a week in which he refused to leave Avengers mansion last month because he LIED and told you gullible mortals that I had a child with a horse. You may remember that week as the time when all the birds in New York were turned into giant pooping vessels, and Thor was nowhere in sight to help put an end to them.

**Stranger:** Now shut up and role play with me again.

_You have disconnected._

"Holy shit. Holy shit!" Tony's eyes were wide and he was slack-jawed with surprise. "Nobody knows about that except for the Avengers. And Loki! I almost just cyber fucked Loki as Loki!"

* * *

Loki stared at his computer screen with an impassive face. He was not pleased.

_Your partner has disconnected. _

How dare the stupid man lie to him, discredit him, and then disconnect! He was going to find him, and he was going to show him exactly what he thought of his behavior. Loki closed his eyes and focused on a tracking spell. It took him a little over three minutes because he didn't know the face of the person he was looking for. He teleported immediately, materializing behind a swivel chair in a large living room space. Loki spun the chair over, snarling, and promptly froze when he came face to face with Tony Stark: the Iron Man.

Tony stared back at him, mouth agape and eyes the size of saucers. "Well," he interrupted the silence, "this is awkward."

"You," Loki started, "that was really you?"

"Um, what was me? No. Of course it wasn't me. No, no. Fuck, it was you? It was fucking you. Why the fuck do you know how to use the internet, anyway?" Tony rambled.

"Why do I- Wait, how _dare_ you pretend to be me!" Loki exclaimed, still not over the shock.

"Me? How dare you pretend to be me while fucking yourself, you egotistical son of a bitch!" Tony shot back.

Loki gripped Tony's shirt at the neck, nearly cutting off his air supply. "If you _ever _speak of this to anyone I will feed your innards to you." Loki towered over Tony menacingly.

"How stupid do you think I am? You think I'm going to tell someone? What the hell do you expect me to say? 'Hey guys, I almost got off on cyber sexing a supervillain.' They'd either send me to the loony bin or arrest me because they'd find a reason why getting hard from a supervillain is illegal," Tony spat, knocking Loki's hand off his shirt.

Loki was staring at Tony. "You got _what_?"

"I- uh- what?" Tony stuttered, realizing what he'd just admitted.

Loki smirked and looked Tony up and down lasciviously. He stopped at Tony's crotch and grinned. "It appears you still are." He placed a hand on each of Tony's shoulders and smoothed out the creases on his shirt.

"What the hell are you doing?" Tony tried to back away.

"Tell me, Tony, did thinking of me turn you on?" Loki breathed into Tony's ear.

Tony gulped helplessly. "Loki, I'm an Avenger. You're my enemy."

"You didn't have a problem with it online," Loki nuzzled the top of Tony's head.

"You weren't real online! Well, you were, but I didn't know it was actually you!" Tony defended.

"That doesn't change the fact that it was me who turned you on," Loki smirked. "I can call a truce for tonight."

Tony scoffed. "You want to screw me so you have more of a reason to kill me tomorrow. That's hardly a truce."

"If you let me screw you I'd have less of a reason to kill you," Loki insisted.

"No." Tony folded his arms over his chest and looked away stubbornly.

Loki turned Tony's face so he was looking at him. "I can just force you. You can't leave a god waiting, Stark."

"I can call the Avengers," Tony threatened.

Loki rolled his eyes. "Why haven't you already?"

"Because I'm mad at them. This is all their fault! Now go away." Tony shrugged Loki's hands off his shoulders and pushed him away.

"Just pretend we are still role playing, except you are you and I am myself," Loki suggested. He shoved his hand down Tony's pants when Tony paused to consider it.

Tony groaned. "Hey! That's cheating. Stop it!" He protested.

"You don't want me to," Loki smirked. "Is that lust I see in your eyes, Mr. Stark?"

"No!" Tony hissed.

"You would turn down a god?"

"Goddamnit," Tony sighed. "Just shut up and fuck me," he said, rubbing himself against Loki's hand.

Loki grinned triumphantly. "Good choice."

"You didn't give me an alternative," Tony said in between moaning.

"Of course I did. You could have chosen to do it willingly or unwillingly."

"Son of a bitch," Tony muttered.

Loki pulled Tony's shirt off with one hand, ripped the buttons in the process, and ignored Tony's complaints. He let go of Tony to undress both of them. Loki took in every inch of Tony's body and licked his lips suggestively.

"I don't have time for foreplay," Tony smirked. "Just get to it."

"Turn around," Loki commanded. Tony did. Loki grabbed a hold of Tony's hips and slowly pushed into Tony without a second's notice.

Tony held his breath then groaned in pain. "Bitch, you could have warned me!"

"Where's the fun in that?" Loki began to thrust.

Tony gasped and then let out a series of moans. "I," pause, "hate," gasp, "you," moan.

"I hate you, too," Loki grit his teeth and moaned. "Most of the time."  
Tony hummed in approval.

The two of them continued in conversational silence, the only noises escaping them being moans, grunts, curses, and the occasional "Loki" and "Tony."

Tony reached his climax first, his cries and tightening hold causing Loki to climax as well. Loki pulled out of Tony and plopped down next to him, both of them panting.

Tony opened his eyes to the sight of Loki smirking down at him. "What?" He snapped.

"Iron Man just gave himself up to me," Loki grinned.

Tony snorted. "No I didn't, and if you tell anyone I'll rip _your_ insides out and feed them to you."

"So violent." Loki cooed and stroked his cheek, mockingly sweet.

Tony slapped it away. "Go to hell."

"You were just screaming my name, Tony." Loki reminded him with an innocent face.

"Yeah, well, you're my enemy. You slept with a superhero. You're tainted!" Tony exclaimed.

Loki rolled his eyes. "I think you are the tainted one. You slept with a villain. Heroes don't do that."

"You tricked me into doing it," Tony whined.

"Your acts were of your own volition." Loki rolled over and stretched. "Now, if you don't mind, I'll take my leave now."

Tony huffed. "And never come back."

"Oh, I'll be back," Loki beamed.

"I really will call the Avengers!" Tony shouted half heartedly.

"No, you won't," Loki waved and was gone in a flash of green light.

Loki did come back. Tony never did call the Avengers. And if Loki attempted to kill each Avenger except Iron Man, well, everyone was too busy fighting to notice.

* * *

**Thank you for reading!**


End file.
